The Long Loneliness Cure
“We have all known the long loneliness and we have learned that the only solution is love
and that love comes with community.”
–Dorothy Day
My first Catholic friend, Vicky Martinez, from New York City, helped put a human face on this vast institution. As children of religious parents, we both learned about Jesus, yet we remained in our separate spheres. She was no more comfortable in my plain, “shoe-box” church than I would have been in her ornate Catholic sanctuary.
Stuart and I lived in a community house for two weeks with the SOOP (Service Opportunities with Our Partners) program. SOOP has provided Mennonite retirees opportunities to combine travel, sunshine, and service in the winter time. Pastor Peter Wiebe had a vision thirty years ago that continues:
“Retirement in good health is a gift of God, and our gratitude should be expressed in loving service to God and His people.”
The Mennonites are a small minority in the huge Sun Valley of Arizona. But they have made a mark. Trinity Mennonite in Glendale, just down the street from the SOOP House, is connected to several nonprofit organizations, including the SOOP House.
Monday night dinner: L-R Trudie, Shirley, Ruth Ann, Kim, Stuart, Peter, Bertha, and Tim. Four of us are from Pennsylvania. Three from Steinbach, Canada. One from Ohio. One from Phoenix. Volunteers take turns preparing meals and cleaning the house. They also pay a modest fee for their room and board. Bob Wybel photo.
When we, as newbie volunteers, showed up on the St. Vincent de Paul campus, we got a royal welcome. The director greeted us personally and hugged our director Kim Kellogg. “We love SOOPers!” she said. She tallied the hours SOOP contributed in 2026: 1500. It’s a drop in the bucket compared to the need, but every drop is necessary. “Volunteers make it possible” is the motto printed on their t-shirts, along with a four-word mission statement:
Feed, Clothe, House, Heal
Much of SOOP’s depth comes from the relationships Kim has built with local programs like St. Mary’s Food Bank, and the Vineyard Thrift Store. Kim doesn’t just manage schedules; he also jumps into the fray. Once, when it was clear that a local director was having a bad day, Kim asked if we could pray for her. We naturally clustered around her, joining our tears with hers.
St. Vincent de Paul welcomes all outside the huge campus that houses multiple ministries in Phoenix, AZ.
At the end of this short video is the face that connects all Christian volunteers to each other and to the poor.
For it clothes the naked,
It comforts the sorrowful,
It gives to the hungry food,
And it shelters the destitute.
It cares for the blind and lame,
The widow and orphan child.
That’s true evangelical faith.
But where you hear of a poor, simple, cast-off little flock, which is despised and rejected by the world, join them; for where you hear of the cross, there is Christ. . . . Honor the Lord in the works of your hands, and let the light of the Gospel shine through you. Love your neighbor. Deal with an open, warm heart your bread to the hungry, clothe the naked, and do not tolerate having two of anything, because there are always those who are in need.
Stuart assembling boxes for the St. Mary’s food bank. Photo by Bob Wybel
Three SOOP volunteers, L-R: Shirley, Trudie, Ruth Ann. Photo by Stuart.
Thanks for sharing this experience, Shirley. I have almost finished reading “Five Little Indians” by Michelle Good and it is the heartbreaking story of Indian Residential schools and how badly Indigenous children were treated. It is easy to judge and come to the conclusion that this is what the Catholic Church is all about. I needed to hear another side, another perspective to reach the conclusion that this is only one aspect of failed humanity, which we can find everywhere. Let’s not throw the baby out with the bathwater!
So true, Elfrieda. We have to appreciate the good and do penance for the bad. One story I didn’t have time to tell was that of a young girl who had her misshapen mouth transformed by a dentist at St. Vincent de Paul who gave her implants. The girl eventually came back as a volunteer, then she decided to become a dentist herself. Today she fixes the smiles of other unfortunate people who are afraid to show their faces in public.
You and Stuart are prime examples of the ethic of compassion, documenting your experience at SOOP with other volunteers in Arizona. As I read, the familiar Menno Simons ‘quote popped into mind and then I saw you recorded it too along with music. I also thought of the Center for Justice and Peacebuilding at our alma mater, EMU, and their mission “There’s no time to hate, no time to hurt, only time to work and love” ~ quote by an EMU alumnus from India. https://emu.edu/cjp/
And you ask, “How do you find your community of love?” I don’t have to look farther than my street where my walking partner, Barbara, lives. I was able to minister food and comfort after her recent hip surgery. I was able to do the same when I got to take a meal to a couple in my Bible study, the husband with a similar surgery.
Thank you, Shirley, for inspiring me to keep reaching out and touching others’ lives, as Christ taught by His example.
Marian, did you have a burlap poster with the “true evangelical faith” quote printed on it? I searched for one of those on the internet and couldn’t find it. 🙂
We have been shaped by many of the same people and their history. And now we get to continue building communities of love, starting, as you do, with those close by.
Blessings to you and to your neighbors and friends.
My Aunt Ruthie had Menno Simons’ statement on a wall in her sitting room, but it wasn’t burlap. It was inlaid wood. I looked at it so often when I observed it hanging on the wall at Grandma’s house. I don’t know why I didn’t snap it up before the sale. Here is the blog post I’m referring to and you were the first to comment: https://marianbeaman.com/2013/05/01/loving-hands-homes-teddy-bears/
That must be it — inlaid wood! I remember brown letters on a brown background. Thanks for helping my memory.
From 1964-65 I worded with some Catholics at Columbia Hospital of Columbia PA. Then in 1977 I met a new Catholic friend who married a Mennonite and in 2026 we continue that friendship. Year by years many more simular connections were made…. fine Christian Catholic connections.. Indeed we are better for broadening our horizons.
“There’s no time to hate, no time to hurt, only time to work and love” ~ quote by an EMU alumnus from India. https://emu.edu/cjp/
Joanne, yes, working side by side with others gives us a chance to overcome hesitancies and biases and to see the many ways we are similar as well as to appreciate the differences. I appreciate the link to EMU’s CJP program. Thanks for sharing it here.
Thanks for including the link to the MCCL choir singing True Evangelical Faith Our granddaughter was a member of that choir. I think the video you shared was during their tour to the Czech Republic a few summers ago. For sure, we can learn much from other faith traditions.
How wonderful that you found your granddaughter singing in this post. And thank you for suggesting the location of the concert. I thought the background was more ornate than most local Catholic churches. It makes sense that they may have been singing in a Czech Republic cathedral on tour.
I love to attend MCCL concerts. They pick great music and sing out beautifully!
Shirley, thank you for your thoughts and for putting them into writing to challenge us in ecumenical work. I love that SOOP in Phoenix can demonstrate the relationship with our brothers and sisters from whom we have been separated too long. Working with the larger Catholic community as Mennonites sometimes looks like an elephant and a rabbit joining in a common task. This is a great testimony quietly done by some 400 SOOPers coming to us in Phoenix from five provinces and 11 states in the past 30 plus years. SOOP is an organization of the Mennonite Church USA and Mennonite Central Committee, Canada.
Thank you, Peter, for these additional statistics on the long tradition of SOOP. And, of course, the Phoenix location is only one of many others around the country. It’s wonderful to see the inter-Mennonite cooperation between MCC Canada and the Mennonite Mission Network also. The image of the elephant and the rabbit brought a smile to my lips. Hop hop.
Thank you Shirley! I am studying Mennonite traditions and would like to know your thoughts on “conservative dress” . Please know, I’m learning.
Well, Jennifer, that’s a deep subject. 🙂 What would you like to know?
You might find this post helpful. https://shirleyshowalter.com/mennonite-bonnet-and-covering-stories-part-one/
Wonderful to learn about this program. Thank you.
Thank you for reading, Maren.